| Scene | Episode |
| 'You are a hideous orangutang!' | |
| ''I'm a doctor and I want my sausages!' | |
| ' A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.' | |
| 'You wouldn't understand, dear - it's called 'style' | |
| 'Well I'm sorry it wasn't wide enough for you. A lot of the English cars have steering wheels.' | |
| 'Is it possible for me to reserve the BBC2 channel for the duration of this televisual feast?' | |
| 'If you don't like duck, you're rather stuck!' | |
| | Scene | Episode |
| 'I was rather hoping that instead of just dumping the bricks in a pile you might have found time to cement them together' | |
| Next contestant - Sybil Fawlty from Torquay. Special subject - the bleedin' obvious. | |
| 'I can speak English, I learn it from a book!' | |
| 'Downstairs with your hat and coat!' | |
| 'Yes you did, you invaded Poland...' | |
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