Country Song or George Costanza?

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Can you name the source of these lines as George Costanza in Seinfeld or title lines from country songs?

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LineCountry (C) or George (G)
Why can't I have a heart attack?
I've been yelling at strangers on the street.
If my mom and pop ran a store, I wouldn't shop there.
How can I miss you when you won't go away?
The jerk store called. They're running out of you.
I think she finds my stupidity charming.
She got the goldmine and I got the shaft.
I'm much better in the daytime than I am at night.
This woman hates me so much, I'm starting to like her.
Everybody loves a nut. The whole world loves a weirdo.
I've been flushed from the bathroom of your heart.
I was brought up to say 'God bless you.'
LineCountry (C) or George (G)
My head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus.
Here's a quarter, call someone who cares.
They oughta name a drink after you.
So are you gonna sleep with me or what?
I'm gonna hire a wino to decorate our home.
Everybody's doing something; we'll do nothing.
It's not a lie if you believe it.
Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?
I meant every word that he said.
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy
My mother always said I'm not special.
Pardon me, I've got someone to kill.

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