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Can you name the songs given the FML?

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Score 0/30 Timer 08:00
Today, I killed a man and told my mom. It made her cry. FML.
Today, I sang it note for note.
It didn't help. FML.
Today my girlfriend kicked me out. She put everything I own in a box (to the left). FML
Today, I realized my boy had grown up just like me. Poor kid. FML.
Today, I was talkin' s*** and I didn't think that she would hear it. She heard it. FML.
Today, she wants my love and she wants my revenge. I don't even know what that means?! FML.
Today, I left the gate open.
Rex and Fido got out. FML.
Today, I bought a fur coat, a monkey and some art (not a Garfunkel). Then I woke up. FML.
Today, I got my shoes shined. I had to take their word. Ham on. FML.
Today, I was admiring Fergie's curves. She started some drama. FML.
Today, I tried and I tried and I tried and I tried. But, you see, I'm on a losing streak. FML.
Today, your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying. FML.
Today, the music died. FML.
Today, I couldn't believe the news. I closed my eyes but it wouldn't go away. FML.
Today, I woke up feeling like P. Diddy. The bottle of Jack didn't help. FML.
Today, it looks as though my troubles are here to stay. FML.
Today, I wished I was special, but I'm a weirdo. I don't belong here. FML.
Today, I was drowning and this guy wouldn't help me. He saw what I did. FML.
Today, she told my heart.
It didn't understand. FML.
Today, I had to tell dad I was pregnant and keeping the baby. He was not impressed. FML.
Today, London is drowing.
I live by the river. FML
Today, this girl said her kid is mine. But I'm not even her lover. FML.
Today, I called room service for some wine. They polished off the last bottle 40 years ago. FML.
Today, my ex-girlfriend called to remind me of the mess I left when I went away. I should have known. FML.
Today, I was lost in space. The papers were more concerned with what shirts I wear. FML
Today, they thought I shot the deputy. I swear I didn't. FML.
Today, a landmine took my legs, arms, hearing, sight and speech. But I'm still alive. FML.
Today, I've got your picture, I've got your picture.
Now I'm 日本. エム エル エフ.
Today, when I woke up, I wasn't the man who woke up next to you. You were many miles away. FML.
Today, I finally did that. FML.

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