Frank: We're sorry to bother you at such a time like this, Mrs. Twice...
Frank: Now do you think you can beat The Champ? Buddy: I can take him blindfolded.
Ed: Yes, the butler found it; it was tied to this window and thrown into the rock garden. I sent the note to the lab; they're demanding one million dollars.
Lana: He hangs out there with some chorus girl, a floozy named Mimi Du Jour Ed: Du Jour? Is she French? Lana: That's just her stage name, her real name is Mimi Coffee. Ed: Coffee?
Mimi: Is this some kind of bust?
Frank: Well, let's say a new merchant moves into the neighbourhood, opens up a shop. Ed:All right.
Dutch: Who are you and how did you get in here?
Veronica: That was nice work. You took a big chance doing that.
Mary: You're not the man I married. Buddy: How can you say that?
Mr. Burton: Lt. Drebin, what do I do?
Frank: Just in time, Eddie. Eddie: Piece of cake, Lieutenant.
Frank: When I got home I received a call from Mimi Du Jour. She said she wanted to see me at the club right away...
Frank: It took me two weeks to find Stella's apartment...
Rocky: Betcha'd hate to see something happen to your little key store. Frank: What about my little keaster?
Ed: Married, one child...
Coroner: It's a typical four-fifteen. Frank: Four-fifteen?
Sally: No, I shot Twice after Jim fell. Frank: You shot twice and Jim Fell?
Ed: Frank, I know you got Sally's arrest record from R & I, but how did you ever figure out she was the one behind the loan office heist? Frank: Just a little hunch back at the office.
Tony Dewonderful: Where do you live, lady? Audience Member: Right here.
Frank: I was just going over the arraignment report. It looks like the butler Thames will be doing his serving from now on up in the Statesville prison. Ed: Along with Martin, Dutch Gunderson, Lana and Sally Decker. Frank, when will people learn that crime doesn't pay?
Mr. Burton: The lakefront? My God, do you know how big that area is? My daughter's a needle in a haystack!
Frank: Johnny, I need some information and fast. There's a woman in trouble. Johnny: You mean Mary, the boxer's wife who was just kidnapped? Frank: Right. You know anything about it?
Mrs. Twice: Oh, poor Ralph! Do you know what it's like to be married to a wonderful man for fourteen years?
Ed: Alright, Sally, you're under arrest. Sergeant, take her away and book her.