| Hint | Excuse |
| This school may seem only 90 miles away, but it's actually lightyears | |
| This coach recruits Texas better than ... well Texas | |
| You would have had to be born 1993 or earlier to witness the last Aggie win there | |
| Excuse is now 7 years old and has run its course | |
| Still paying for this excuse of a coach ... literally | |
| Can't afford to pay for this excuse ... again, quite literally. Besides, look what he did for Favre | |
| The Wrecking Crew certainly didn't have these on their helmets | |
| Watercoolers on the Aggie sideline are this color? | |
| AD that is more concerned about generating $ than wins | |
| These students don't aren't real fans -- they don't even uncover | |
| Gunther tries to inspire the Ags with this song | |