Epic Movie Quotes

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Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
I tea-bagged your drum set!
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
Let off some steam, Bennett.
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
I'm a stallion, baby!
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
Are you not entertained?
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
Time to nut up or shut up!
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
I fart in your general direction.
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
Show Me the Money!
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
Attica! Attica!
They're filming midgets!
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
Give these people air!
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
Get away from her, you bitch!
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
I have got to get me one of these!
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
Dodge this.
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
If He Dies.. He Dies
I see dead people
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
I wish I knew how to quit you.
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
A boy's best friend is his mother.
I drink your milkshake!
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
It's been emotional
You stand your ground and fight!
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
That's A Spicy Meatball!
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
Sanka... you dead?

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