Epic Movie Quotes

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I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
I wish I knew how to quit you.
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
I tea-bagged your drum set!
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
Get away from her, you bitch!
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
I have got to get me one of these!
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
Are you not entertained?
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
I see dead people
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
Attica! Attica!
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
Sanka... you dead?
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
Give these people air!
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
They're filming midgets!
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
I'm a stallion, baby!
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
A boy's best friend is his mother.
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
Show Me the Money!
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
I fart in your general direction.
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
I drink your milkshake!
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
You stand your ground and fight!
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
That's A Spicy Meatball!
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
Time to nut up or shut up!
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
Let off some steam, Bennett.
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
If He Dies.. He Dies
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
Dodge this.
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
It's been emotional
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

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