Epic Movie Quotes

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I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
I see dead people
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
You stand your ground and fight!
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
Let off some steam, Bennett.
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
Dodge this.
Show Me the Money!
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
Are you not entertained?
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
That's A Spicy Meatball!
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
It's been emotional
They're filming midgets!
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
I'm a stallion, baby!
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
Attica! Attica!
I have got to get me one of these!
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
I wish I knew how to quit you.
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
Sanka... you dead?
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
Get away from her, you bitch!
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
I drink your milkshake!
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
If He Dies.. He Dies
I fart in your general direction.
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
I tea-bagged your drum set!
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
A boy's best friend is his mother.
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
Give these people air!
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
Time to nut up or shut up!
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?

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