Epic Movie Quotes

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Show Me the Money!
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
I fart in your general direction.
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
Attica! Attica!
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
I tea-bagged your drum set!
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
They're filming midgets!
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
I drink your milkshake!
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
That's A Spicy Meatball!
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
Let off some steam, Bennett.
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
It's been emotional
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
Dodge this.
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Time to nut up or shut up!
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
You stand your ground and fight!
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
Get away from her, you bitch!
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
A boy's best friend is his mother.
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
If He Dies.. He Dies
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
Are you not entertained?
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
I have got to get me one of these!
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
I wish I knew how to quit you.
I see dead people
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
I'm a stallion, baby!
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
Give these people air!
Sanka... you dead?
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'

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