Epic Movie Quotes

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When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
If He Dies.. He Dies
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
They're filming midgets!
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Attica! Attica!
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
Dodge this.
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
Give these people air!
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
It's been emotional
I have got to get me one of these!
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
I tea-bagged your drum set!
Let off some steam, Bennett.
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
You stand your ground and fight!
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
Time to nut up or shut up!
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
I fart in your general direction.
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
I wish I knew how to quit you.
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
That's A Spicy Meatball!
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
Sanka... you dead?
I see dead people
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
Get away from her, you bitch!
Show Me the Money!
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
I'm a stallion, baby!
Are you not entertained?
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
I drink your milkshake!
A boy's best friend is his mother.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.

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