Epic Movie Quotes

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Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
I'm a stallion, baby!
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
I drink your milkshake!
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
You stand your ground and fight!
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
I fart in your general direction.
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
Are you not entertained?
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
Get away from her, you bitch!
It's been emotional
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
Show Me the Money!
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
Attica! Attica!
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
They're filming midgets!
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
I see dead people
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
I have got to get me one of these!
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
Give these people air!
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
Let off some steam, Bennett.
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
I wish I knew how to quit you.
Dodge this.
If He Dies.. He Dies
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
That's A Spicy Meatball!
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
A boy's best friend is his mother.
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
Sanka... you dead?
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
Time to nut up or shut up!
I tea-bagged your drum set!
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants

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