Epic Movie Quotes

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I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
I have got to get me one of these!
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
Sanka... you dead?
That's A Spicy Meatball!
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
A boy's best friend is his mother.
I drink your milkshake!
Get away from her, you bitch!
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
It's been emotional
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
I see dead people
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
If He Dies.. He Dies
They're filming midgets!
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
Dodge this.
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
I wish I knew how to quit you.
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
Are you not entertained?
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.
Give these people air!
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
I fart in your general direction.
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
You stand your ground and fight!
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
Attica! Attica!
Let off some steam, Bennett.
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
Time to nut up or shut up!
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
Show Me the Money!
I'm a stallion, baby!
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
I tea-bagged your drum set!
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste

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