Epic Movie Quotes

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Ma! The meatloaf! Fu*k!
Dodge this.
You are not in Kansas anymore. You're on Pandora
I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old friend for dinner
Well, that's because you've got big jugs. I mean your boobs are huge. I mean, I wanna squeeze 'em..... Mama!
You remind me of my father..... I HATED my father!
Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'
I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants
I believe you are blushing, Mr. Big Artiste
If He Dies.. He Dies
I said he'll flip you...Flip you. Flip ya for real
If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you
I see dead people
Get away from her, you bitch!
I'm like my mother, I stereotype. It's faster.
I like these calm little moments before the storm. It reminds me of Beethoven. Can you hear it?
This is a real badge, I’m a real cop, and this is a real fu*king gun
I'm just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a bit of torture.
There never was much hope...just a fool's hope
If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer
I just sharted....I tried to fart and a little sh*t came out
I'm going to give you the choice... I never had
Mediocrities everywhere... I absolve you
Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
It's been emotional
Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.'
Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!
I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up!
You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.
Let off some steam, Bennett.
Of Course I'm Home. I'm Always Home. I'm Uncool.
Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos more creative!
I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
I have been touched by your kids... and I'm pretty sure that I've touched them aswel
Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more.......GAME OVER!
I’m gonna punch you in the ovary, that’s what I’m gonna do. A straight shot, right to the babymaker.”
Say 'what' again. Say 'what' again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfu*ker, say what one more Goddamn time!
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?
Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell!
I don't care if he's Muhammad 'I'm hard' Bruce Lee. You can't change fighters.
Vanity... definitely my favorite sin.
Yeah one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again..... Ever.
I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle
We can become cops, or criminals. Today, what I'm saying to you is this: when you're facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?
Ten oughta do it, don't you think? ...You think we need one more?..You think we need one more..All right, we'll get one more..
Would you please put some pants on? I feel kinda weird having to ask you twice
If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker.
Carpe diem, seize the day boys
I fart in your general direction.
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
Attica! Attica!
You best start believing in ghost stories..You're in one
People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch
Time to nut up or shut up!
Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big di*k and I say when we roll.
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
You stand your ground and fight!
Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it.
I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
Hey faggot, they're not gay! They're hobbits!
Are you not entertained?
Give these people air!
She's my daughter!...She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter...She's my sister and my daughter.'
A man tells his stories so many times that he becomes the stories. They live on after him, and in that way he becomes immortal.
That's A Spicy Meatball!
You think I'm fu*king around here? Mark it zero!
I couldn't help it, boss. I tried to take it back, but it was too late.
What we've got here is... failure to communicate.
You know the difference between you and me? I make this look GOOD.
I wish I knew how to quit you.
An old man dies. A young woman lives....fair trade.
Show Me the Money!
I tea-bagged your drum set!
Back off, man. I’m a scientist
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family
That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die.
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants
It's like looking in a mirror...only....not.
'Mein Führer! I can walk!
A boy's best friend is his mother.
Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she won't know whether to sh*t or wind her wristwatch
Ernest Hemingway once wrote, 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' I agree with the second part
Damnit! Why didn't I concur?!
He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!
Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
I got her number. How do you like them apples?
When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fu*k the lemons,' and bail.
I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?
We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.
I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch.
I'm a stallion, baby!
Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood....nobody!
You guys give up yet? Or are you thirsty for more?
I have got to get me one of these!
I want you to hit me.. as hard as you can.
I was 27 years old the first time I died.
Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.
You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me?
The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fu*ked.
I'm going to count to three... there will not be a four
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
I may be a bastard, but I'm not a fu*king bastard
Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning.
I'm no hero. I was just trying to get that babbling gook off my lawn!
If you was to put me and this here sniper rifle anywhere up to and including one mile from Adolf Hitler... with a clean line of sight... Pack your bags, fellas. War's over
You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'.
I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fu*kin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
How 'bout no... you crazy Dutch bastard?
Well, in the words of Porky Pig, 'Pi pi pi pi pi piss off, Lou.
Slapping the bass! Slappa da bass! Slappa da bass mon!
I gotta catch a glimpse of these warlocks. Let's move.
Who was that pointy-eared bastard?
Sanka... you dead?
It's OK, I wouldn't remember me either
They're filming midgets!
Well, this piece is called ‘Lick My Love Pump.
You know, I've had more rewarding friendships than this one. Although I do get to keep telling the same jokes.
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
Put... the bunny... back... in the box
You see, before he came down here, it never snowed. And afterwards, it did. If he weren't up there now... I don't think it would be snowing.
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters...That was a pretty good day
I drink your milkshake!
King Kong ain't got sh*t on me
The man likes to play chess; let's get him some rocks.
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her?
You don't get it, do you? This isn't 'good cop, bad cop.' This is fag and New Yorker. You're in a lot of trouble.

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