| Clue | Term |
| Soft drink with the highest caffeine content legally available over the counter | |
| Lesbian Robin, Mustache Marshall, Stripper Lily, Mexican Wrestler Ted, or Fertility Specialist Barney | |
| The dirtiest joke ever told inquires about the difference between these two objects | |
| 'Love thy neighbor, but never ever, ever, ever 'love' thy neighbor' | |
| Phenomenon where individually flawed women look hot as a group | |
| The distance from one's bedroom one feels comfortable wearing only their underpants | |
| A societal rubric outlining scream etiquette: You can only scream beneath you. | |
| 17 dates worth of spectacle compressed into one | |
| Reversion to past behavior in the presence of an old friend once associated with said behavior | |
| Loss of ability or confidence due to nervousness | |
| Derivation of the name 'Barney,' impossibly ludicrous as it is neither close, or even a name | |
| Seven women, Seven days, No rejections | |
| A night, event, or situation certain to be memorable. We hope you are not lactose intolerant. | |
| Cursed individual who will always depart moments before something amazing happens | |
| True New York citizenship is attained after seeing this celebrity in person | |
| Somebody with a soft cuddly exterior, but a formidable warrior when the time comes | |
| Mysterious hybrid creature featuring both mouse and cockroach characteristics | |
| Common knowledge one should know by adulthood, but somehow never learned | |
| February 13th, a day when single women drop their standards just for a Valentine's Day romance | |
| The theory that a man will eventually want to sleep with any woman after a period of time, no matter how initially repugnant | |
| An Eriksen family tradition: Ice hockey, played with tennis rackets and a basketball | |
| Nope, that's the celebrity | |
| Nope, that's what he collected | |
| Nope, everybody's seen him | |
| Ice... Ket... Ball? That just sounds weird. | |