| Roast | Team |
|---|
| Your QB is a blatant douchebag who rapes women, but he wins you superbowls, so it's all good | |
| Another franchise notorious for losing, your reign of glory was short and forgettable...also you were the first completely defeated team | |
| Your current coach has one of the best teams in the league and he still can't win anything important...also you're known as the team that loses superbowls | |
| Nobody remembers your only superbowl appearance except for you, even though it was, what, about 5 years ago, and your team just always seems to lose | |
| All your wins in this past decade don't excuse 1-4 in the NFC Championship...also your fans are notoriously terrible people | |
| If it weren't for one person, you'd still be 0-2 in the superbowl. Not to mention you were blatantly caught cheating and everybody's already forgot about it | |
| It took 8 years from your team's creation to get a winning season, despite having one of the best WRs in the league | |
| Nice superbowl win, but you've been rebuilding since then...not to mention the best thing in your franchise history is a rushing record | |
| Recently had a superbowl appearance, then your QB retired, so good luck with that...you also have one of the longest histories of losing | |
| You've been for the most part rebuilding since your reign of glory ended about 15 years ago | |
| Sure you've made some noise in your short existence, but anybody can tell you your team is going nowhere fast | |
| Only one superbowl appearance and you lost that too, and you don't have the balls to fire your coach | |
| Your town is a horrible place and your fans are laughed at...also your best QB ever left, went to a rival, came back and embarrassed you | |
| The best player in your franchise history probably murdered someone, and your all time leading rusher was part of a drug deal | |
| One superbowl appearance, which you lost, highlights your very dull history | |
| You're notorious for losing, yet your fans may be be the loudest in the league, even though they've only recently tasted victory due to one man | |
| | Roast | Team |
|---|
| Your fans are notorious for being the most depraved group of people in the country, not to mention your team has been the laughingstock of the league for 8 years | |
| You're the only one who doesn't realize your QB is awful, just because of one fluke play that wasn't even his doing | |
| You lost 4 straight superbowls, and those are the good years of your history | |
| Every single year of the past decade you were the team to beat, yet you're still 0-1 in the superbowl since you first got there in the 90s | |
| One newly acquired overrated QB doesn't make you superbowl competitors...not to mention your management sucks...and your fan base sucks too | |
| One man took your team from nothing to greatness, and nothing is what you'll become once he calls it quits | |
| Your team is still rebuilding from when your prize RB left over 40 years ago...also your fans look and sound ridiculous | |
| Historically one of the best teams in the league, but once your playoff impotence is mentioned, you never stop talking about that history | |
| With one of the so called best QBs in the league, you still can't win jack in the playoffs...also you're 0-2 in the superbowl to the same team | |
| Your best QB ever actually lost 3 superbowls before he ever won any...not to mention once he left, your amazing coach became a joke | |
| Nobody remembers your superbowl win, mainly because it was so long ago and you've sucked since then | |
| Nice two winning seasons this past decade...plus your fan base might just be worse than the Pittsburgh Pirates fans | |
| You had one of the best RBs ever, and you still managed to continue your history of losing, which still rages on today | |
| No superbowl appearances in 40 years, yet you haven't shut up since then | |
| You had one of the best QBs of all time and you still couldn't win a single superbowl with him | |
| One mythical championship defense in the 80s doesn't excuse the rest of your very long franchise history being awful | |
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