Can you identify who said this on Lost?

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Can you name the Can you identify who said this on Lost??

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Doctors make the worst patients
Are you on the same island as I am
You finally learned how to tie your own shoes
We can't even get fire
We have 2 giant hamsters running on a massive wheel at our secret underground lair
No, my dad taught me how to drink
Well, maybe we're just not cool with you setting up your own little Patriot Act
It's kinda like, it doesn't scatter...quite right
No I like dogs
That's a lot of peanut butter
If you pick the lock on a Halliburton, I'll put you on my back and fly us to L.A.
Should I go and get a ruler
Should I keep the meter running
This conversation already happened, we just don't remember it
Sure I'm affected. She was hot and I dug her accent
When's your birthday
I think I just realized that I want to live
If you say 'live together,die alone' to me, Jack, I'll smack you across the face
How did they open it - the door that says quarantine
So we saved the world together for a while, and that was lovely
I know. How modern of me
I do this for all the girls I meet on deserted islands
Because then we'd have to dig another grave
Well yeah, here's my favorite leaf! How could I forget this place
Everything smells of Bacon
Have a cluckity-cluck-cluck day, Hugo
I'm not allowed to have chocolate before dinner
You don't wait with warnings. You...warn
I think I liked you better when you just hit people with your stick
As long as the dead guy says there's a good reason, I guess everything's just peachy

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