Can you identify who said this on Lost?

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Can you name the Can you identify who said this on Lost??

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Should I go and get a ruler
No I like dogs
Well, maybe we're just not cool with you setting up your own little Patriot Act
If you say 'live together,die alone' to me, Jack, I'll smack you across the face
Should I keep the meter running
Well yeah, here's my favorite leaf! How could I forget this place
How did they open it - the door that says quarantine
Everything smells of Bacon
No, my dad taught me how to drink
I think I liked you better when you just hit people with your stick
It's kinda like, it doesn't scatter...quite right
You don't wait with warnings. You...warn
So we saved the world together for a while, and that was lovely
We have 2 giant hamsters running on a massive wheel at our secret underground lair
Are you on the same island as I am
I know. How modern of me
Sure I'm affected. She was hot and I dug her accent
This conversation already happened, we just don't remember it
I think I just realized that I want to live
As long as the dead guy says there's a good reason, I guess everything's just peachy
We can't even get fire
If you pick the lock on a Halliburton, I'll put you on my back and fly us to L.A.
That's a lot of peanut butter
Because then we'd have to dig another grave
You finally learned how to tie your own shoes
I do this for all the girls I meet on deserted islands
Doctors make the worst patients
Have a cluckity-cluck-cluck day, Hugo
I'm not allowed to have chocolate before dinner
When's your birthday

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