Homer Simpson or Peter Griffin

Random Television or TV Show Quiz

Can you name the source of these words of wisdom: Homer Simpson ('H') or Peter Griffin ('P')?

Featured Aug 26, 2011

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QuoteHomer or Peter
Math. Math my dear boy is nothing more than the lesbian sister of biology.
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
(Son), with $10,000 we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!
I saw you in that coffee shop, breaking the fifth commandment. Congress passes these things for a reason, (wife).
To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
(Daughter), if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman.
I got an idea, an idea so smart my head would explode if I even began to know what I was talking about.
To you she may be worth a million dollars. But to me she's worthless!
If by 'read', you mean 'imagine the naked lady', then yes.
Any problem caused by a tank can be solved by a tank.
(Son), everything I say is a lie. Except that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that. And that.
'To Start Press Any Key.' Where's the 'ANY' key?
That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!
All my life I've had one dream, to achieve my many goals.
Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.
We're officially on welfare. Come on, kids. Help me scatter car parts on the front lawn.
(Daughter), vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
I think (boss) picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around.
Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you - very homosexually.
I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!
Oh my god, (friend), there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'
If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing.
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Aw, c'mon (wife), isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?
People make up lies all the time. You know Vietnam? Never happened.
Oh yeah? Well, according to paragraph 7, sentence 3, word 8 of the Geneva Convention... 'the'.
I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
If I'm a child that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if I'm going stand here and take this from a pervert.
When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.
When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is another nail.
Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?
I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.
Now kids, Daddy only drank so that the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'
Operator! Give me the number for 911!
See, (daughter), things always work out if you just do whatever you want without thinking about the consequences.
They look at me and see a loser. Except that guy with the lazy eye... He sees a loser and a snack machine.
Step aside, its time for me to do my fatherly duty. Haha I said duty, but no time to laugh about it now.
Aw crap, since when did they change the meaning of 'for' to 'from'?
The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother! I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws!
(Boss), I can't come to work today because I was in a terrible plane crash. My family is dead and I am a vegetable. See you tomorrow.
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.
Son, this is a big day for you. Today, you become the man of the house, because, when we get home, your mother is going to kill me.
I had such a crush on her. Until I met you, (wife). You're my silver medal.
I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming.
Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Now, I know you're a feminist, and I think that's adorable, but this is grown-up time and I'm the man.

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