| Character FML | Name of Character |
| Today, I found out that my younger sister is having my boyfriend’s baby, and my father drove my long lost daughter away. FML. | |
| Today, I was leaving Walford, driving through the snow when I realised I had forgotten the most important thing. FML. | |
| Today, I was a greedy plonker. Oh no hang on, that’s every day. FML. | |
| Today, I tried to kill my husband after he left me for his baby’s mother who later rejected him anyway. FML. | |
| Today, we were running from the police on our wedding day and my husband died for a crime I committed. FML. | |
| Today, I realised my boyfriend is actually a paedophile. FML. | |
| Today, my daughter exposed my affair with my son’s wife in front of the whole family. FML. | |
| Today, I escaped from the cellar my ex-husband was holding me in. 2/3 husbands trying to kill me isn’t bad. FML. | |
| Today, I was shot and the perpetrator is close to home. FML. | |
| Today, my family disowned me for falling in love with someone of the wrong gender. FML. | |
| | Character FML | Name of Character |
| Today, my 4 kids and I slept at a bus stop. Thank God for my silver bomber jacket keeping us warm. FML. | |
| Today, I finally found my birth mother, but my grandfather told me she didn’t want me. I was fleeing London, when I was mowed down by a car. FML. | |
| Today, I found out that my big sister is actually my mother. And my father is her uncle. FML. | |
| Today, I burnt the nuggets. I never seem to get things right, and my name is always echoing around the square. FML. | |
| Today, my family wised up to my conniving ways leaving them all to be suspects in my later murder. FML. | |
| Today, I planted a tree for my murdered mother. Little did I know, I had nearly dug up the body of my father’s other victim. FML. | |
| Today, I was murdered. Second time lucky. FML. | |
| Today, I was eating cheese and staring at George Michael posters when I realised I hadn’t had a single message on my online dating profile. FML. | |
| Today, my husband squashed my face in the roast dinner he cooked me, so I hit him with an iron. FML. | |
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