Albuquerque!

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Can you name the lyrics in Weird Al's Albuquerque?

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Song Lyric HintMissing LyricExtra Lyric
Way back when I was just a little bitty
living in a box
in the corner of the basement of
half a
down the street from Jerry's
Well okay anyway back then life was going
and everything was just
Except, of course, for the
that every single
My mother would make me a big ol' bowl of
for breakfast. Awwww big
of
It was
so I said to my mom I said
what's up with all the
And my dear, sweet
she just looked at me like a
train. And she leaned right down
and she said,
and then she tied
to the wall, stuck
in my
and forcefed me nothing but
until I was
That's when I
that someday, someday I would get outta
and travel to a
far away place where
is always shining and the air smells like
and the towels are oh so
Where the Shriners and the
play their
all day long and anyone on the street would gladly
for a
Oooh Wakka
Well, let me tell you people, it wasn't long at all before my
Because the very next day a local
had this
to see who could correctly guess the
in Leonard Nimoy's
I was off by three, but I still won the
That's right, a
one-way ticket to
Oh yeah, you know I'd never been on a real
before, and I gotta tell you, it was
Except that I had to sit between two large
with excruciatingly severe
and the little kid in the back of me kept
the whole time, the flight attendants
and salted peanuts, and the
movie was Bio-Dome with Pauly Shore and, oh yeah
airplane engines burned out and we went into a
and the plane
and everybody
Except for me, you know why? Because I
And my seat back in the
Had my
up and
in the
Had
and my seat back
Ahahahahahahaha! Ahhh... So I
from the twisted, burnin'
I crawled on my
for three full days. Draggin' along my big
Song Lyric HintMissing LyricExtra Lyric
and my
and my
and my
and my
autographed
But finally I arrived at the
Albuquerque
where the towels are oh so
And you can eat your soup right out of the
if you wanna. It's okay, they're
Well, I checked into my room and I turned
and I turned on the
and I'm just about to eat that little
when suddenly
Oh well who could that be? I said,
No Answer.
There's no answer.
Well finally I
and it's just what I suspected: some
with a Flock-of-Seagulls haircut and
Well anyway he burst into my room and he grabbed
and I'm like, 'Hey you can't have that, that
And he's like,
and I'm like,
and he's like
and I'm like,
So I grabbed his
And he grabbed my
and I bit off his
and he chewed off my
and I took out his
and he gave me a
yesindeedyoubetterbelieveit *GASP* And somehow in the middle of it
The phone got knocked off the hook. Twenty
I heard a familiar voice, and you know what it
It said, 'If you'd like to make a
please hang up and
if you need help hang up and then dial your
If you'd like to make a
please
and
if you need help hang up and then dial your
In
Well, to cut a long story short, he got away with my
and I made a
right then and there that I would not rest, I would not
until the One-nostriled man was
But first I decided to buy some
So I got in my car and drove over to the
and I walked on up to the guy behind the counter and he says 'Yeah
I said, 'You got any
He said, 'No, we're outta
I said, 'You got any
He said, 'No we're outta
I said, 'You got any
He said, 'No we're outta
I said, 'You got any
He said, 'No we're outta
I said, 'You got any
He said,
'...NO WE'RE OUTTA
I said, 'well, in that case - in that case what do you have?' He says,
of
starving,
weasels. I said, 'Okay I'll
Song Lyric HintMissing LyricExtra Lyric
So he hands me the
and I open up the
and the weasels jump out and start
Oh man, they were just going
they were
You know, I think it was about that time when a little
started goin' through my head. I believe it went a
Ahhh get 'em off me
Ohh no get 'em off me
Ooooh God, oh god.... (start typing 'a's until the next answer)
I ran out into the street with these
weasels all over my
Wavin' my arms all around and just runnin' and runnin' and runnin' like a
And as luck would have it, that's exactly when I
Her name was
She was a calligraphy enthusiast with a slight
and hair the color of
And I'll never forget the first thing she said to me, she said 'Hey
That's when I knew it was true
We were inseperable after that (aww) we
together, we
together, we even
The world was our
So we got married and
and had two beautiful children
But then one fateful
Zelda said to me, she said, 'Sweetie pumpkin, do you wanna join the
I said 'Woah, hold on now baby! I'm just not ready for that kind of a
So we broke up and
but that's just the way things go, in
Anyway, things really started lookin' up for me because
I finally achieved my lifelong dream, that's right I got me a
job at the
I even made
when I put out that grease fire with
Yeah everybody was pretty jealous of me after that, I was gettin' a lot of
Ok like one time, I was out in the
trying to remove my
with a
When I see this guy Marty tryin' to
So I say to him, I say, 'Hey
And Marty, he just rolls his eyes and goes, 'Noooo
So I did. And then he gets all
He's like 'Hey man,
Well that's just great, how was I supposed to know that? I'm not a
Besides now he's got a really cute nickname:
Say, that reminds me of another amusing
This guy comes up to me on the street and he tells me
Well I knew what he meant but,
I took a big
out of his
And he's yelling and screaming and bleeding all over and I'm like, 'Hey c'mon
But he just kept rolling around on the
You know, just completely missing the
Some people just
Kinda lost my
OK anyway I know it's kind of a
but I guess the whole point I'm tryin to make here is:
That's all I'm really trying to say and by the way if
and find yourself in an existential quandry of loathing and
At least take a small bit of comfort in knowing that somewhere in this
of ours, there's still a little place... Called Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
I said 'A' (A), 'L' (L), 'B' (B), 'U' (U) *pause*
Albuquerque (times 12)... Albuquerque (drum solo)

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